THOR Struck By Lightning! – Sep. 19, 2005

After conquering over 40 cities and towns in as many days, THOR «The Mighty Rock Warrior» was struck down by an unimaginably powerful bolt of lightning!

This unthinkable event took place in Portland where he was performing for dazzled audiences. As he placed the steel bar to his lips in order to bend it in half with his muscular arms, lightning split the sky and struck him down. He managed to finish the show, but immediately afterwards was rushed into the care of Venus (nurse to the Gods). Due to these unforseen circumstances THOR was forced to cancel the remaining dates on the tour. He is quite fully recovered now and plans to tour again this winter. Look for dates soon.

THOR is continuing to promote his new album, entitled «Thor against the World», and retrospective DVD, entitled «An-THOR-logy», available on Smog Veil Records.

Esta «noticia» (ya no saben lo que inventar para cancelar las giras que no resultan rentables) me ha revelado a un personaje que supera a otros anteriores (búsquense otros ejemplos en los posts de Chorradas). I give you…

THOR (The Legendary Rock Warrior)

Pensaba escoger alguna foto especialmente «interesante» (la de arriba es una entre decenas), o algún dato especialmente suculento (como su costumbre de doblar vigas o reventar bolsas de agua caliente inflándolas a soplidos como parte de su espectáculo), pero navegando por la página no he podido decidirme por una sóla cosa, así que os dejaré para que os empapéis del personaje por vuestra cuenta. Yo de momento voy a buscar la siguiente canción para bajármela:

Throwing Cars At People (On Coke with THOR)
(written by Seth of Anal Cunt)

seth- thor’s coming to town, we’re ready to rock

thor- how much coke do we have in stock?

seth- i’ve got a pound of coke and thor does too

thor- we’re gonna throw every car in town at you, cuz we’re

chorus

thor- throwing cars at people

seth- throwing cars at people

thor- throwing cars at people

back up vocals- on coke with thor

(chorus 4x)

seth- the cops can’t stop us from throwing cars

thor- we’re not afraid of jail, i’ll just bend the bars

seth- we’ve both got noses and needles and pipes

thor- we’ve been up for 7 straight days and nights, just

chorus

seth- the coke’s all gone, guess it’s time to go

thor- plus we’ve run out of cars to throw

seth- we’ll both be back in a day or 2

thor- throwing a bunch of cars at you, cuz we’re

chorus

back up vocals- on coke with thor

thor- on coke with me (x4)